"IF THE MOON SMILED, SHE WOULD RESEMBLE YOU.
YOU LEAVE THE SAME IMPRESSION
OF SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL, BUT ANNIHILATING.”
You are daughter of the stars and destruction, born from the same hands that pin death in the skies as constellations. Something quivers and moans under your skin; phantoms trapped between two worlds, darkness you swallowed whole with premature gums. You don’t need a house to be haunted. You grin, turn the moon over in your smile. All you need is your rune-marked bones, a body promised to crackling skies and howling winds. Death croons within you, burning offerings to lost humanity in the quiet ends of your fingertips, torch held above your head. These days, everybody’s already dead.
You strike your last match, and wait.
i don’t write as much as i used to these days. my words are tired and my dreams faded, like rain swallowed whole on a dark night. i chase strangers in daydreams and fall asleep on buses with my eyes wide open, chewing gum to keep my jaw busy. i saw your hands on a stranger the other day and they were so foreign, it killed me. it killed me.
february is a slow, aching month. mornings are lighter but it stills feel like the air is resistant and sullen, like the bored, abandoned sister of december and the distant cousin of spring. she stands on street corners smoking cigarettes at six in the evening and smiles when it rains, blowing damp smoke rings into the darkness. i am in a very low mental place lately and i want to blame it on pressing skies and rain and cold and endless nights, but it feels more like something darker and deep rooted and restless. i feel heavy and cold and lonely and i spend most my evenings stood waiting at bus stops, unearthing dead weeds under my eyes only to find ten more sprouting in the morning. days drag but night flits past so quickly, like burnt shadows of sodden leaves still falling, like a lighter flicked on and off. this is the darkest time of year, when the final days of winter stretch teasing and unyielding; somewhere, february stands on her street corner and smokes cigarette after cigarette, laughing.